Feelings

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.

It's okay to have and feel our feelings - all of them.

Years into recovery, we may still be battling with ourselves about this issue. Of all the prohibitions we've lived with, this one is potentially the most damaging and the most long-lived.

Many of us needed to shut down the emotional part of ourselves to survive certain situations. We shut down the part of us that feels anger, sadness, fear, joy, and love. We may have turned off our sexual or sensual feelings too. Many of us lived in systems with people who refused to tolerate our emotions. We were shamed or reprimanded for expressing feelings, usually by people who were taught to repress their own.

But times have changed. It is okay now for us to acknowledge and accept our emotions. We don't need to allow our emotions to control us; neither do we need to allow our emotions to control us; neither do we need to rigidly repress our feelings. Our emotional center is a valuable part of us. It's connected to our physical well being, our thinking, and our spirituality.

Our feelings are also connected to that great gift, instinct. They enable us to give and receive love.

We are neither weak nor deficient for indulging in our feelings. It means we're becoming healthy and whole.

Today, I will allow myself to recognize and accept whatever feelings pass through me. Without shame, I will tune in to the emotional part of myself.




I have always had problems with feelings. I grew up in a home that believed that children didn't have feelings. I would try to express what I was feeling only to be told I wasn't able to feel. This caused great confusion within me and started me on the path of suppressing what I was feeling.

In sobriety I have spent much time looking up the definition of different feelings to try and identify what I am feeling. I have learned that feelings are not always true but I can't ignore them. Sometimes what my body is feeling is an important warning device. I have learned that feelings always pass and lead to different feelings.

The biggest lesson I have learned with feelings is that they don't have to control my actions. When I feel false fear I can still do that next right thing. When I am feeling hurt I don't have to lash out and hurt others. When I feel bound by physical limitations I can lift my head high knowing that things are not hopeless. I no longer have to isolate feeling that I am not enough. I can show love to others despite the fear of rejection. This list is endless.

I am grateful that I can feel today ... no matter what the feelings maybe. I am grateful that I have a program that gives me the tools I need to feel confident and walk through my day knowing that no matter what happens all will be well.