Willingness

No matter how much one wishes to try, exactly how can he turn his own will and his own life over to the care of whatever God he thinks there is?A beginning, even the smallest, is all that is needed. Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. ABSI page 122


I am an alcoholic my name is Anna...

When I was new I loved this willingness, I could sit on my sofa all day, full of willingness to work this program. It brought me happy thoughts and warm fuzzies...how grand life was to be willing to turn my life over to my HP! I would sit all day twirling that key of willingness on my finger and go to meetings shouting how willing I was.

But man the day came that I wanted to drink. I called my sponsor and she told me...well you can drink or you can start to work this program. She also told me all the willingness in the world wouldn't keep me sober.

I ... Me... the great and powerful Anna had to take action, it was time to stick that key in the lock. I was in shock...if they knew who I was they wouldn't ask this of me. But I wanted to live, I wanted to be at peace within my soul, I wanted to wake in the morning without my hair hurting, I wanted to be a mother to my children. More then all that I didn't want to take that drink. So I put that key of willingness in the lock.

I learned that I need to be willing to take action and then get up off the sofa and do the action to stay sober. Yes there are times that I sit back down, sigh .. ohhh that was hard work I need a break! It's not too long before my HP is knocking at that door calling me to get back up and take more action.